Last night I dreamed that I was running for Student Council President. I'm not sure what school I was dream-attending, but it was very important and I needed to choose a running mate. So, I chose Sarah Palin, and she accepted. This choice because I like Sarah Palin (although VP of Student Council is probably a more appropriate role for her than VP of America), but because it would enlighten everyone as to what a hypocrite she is.
In the dream, the thinking went like this: If Sarah Palin is my running mate, she will have to espouse and support my progressive and liberal values. But since, she's also John McCain's running mate, she's going to have to keep agreeing with him, too. Since she'll be arguing out of both sides of her mouth, the American public will get wise to her and vote against her. I was totally willing to sacrifice being Student Council President if it meant bringing Sarah Palin down, and ensuring she lost BOTH her VP bids.
Um, this election may prove to be the end of any semblance of sanity I once had. Only time will tell. And by time, I mean 8 days.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
On Broadway
Last week, I found myself driving down Broadway Avenue in North Minneapolis. Now, unlike Chicago, Seattle, and many other cities where the northern areas are fancy schmancy and gentrified, in Minneapolis it's the opposite- most of south Minneapolis is the "better" part. South Minneapolis is where I and pretty much everyone I know grew up.
I realized as I drove down Broadway Avenue, that in the 23 years (3 years in LA and 1 year abroad, adds up to 27 total) I have lived in Minneapolis, I have never actually driven all the way down this thoroughfare of the north side. It's like a different city/country/planet. As I drove, I was dumbfounded that the Chain of Lakes Harriet, Calhoun, and Isles were merely 5 miles away. Discount furniture places with sloppily hand-painted signs on splintering wood. Half the buildings on nearly every street abandoned and boarded up. Four young guys on a street corner, all in wheel chairs (is it overly presumptuous to assume they had all been paralyzed in gun-related incidents?). And weirdest of all, a boarded-up gas station with the sign posting Unleaded for $1.00.
I tried to take a picture of the sign, but the light turned green and I missed it. Somehow I imagine that if I go back soon, the sign will not have changed. I mean, the last time gas was $1.00 even was in about 1998. So, clearly, this gas station has been closed for around 10 years--why is it just standing there like that? How is there a part of Minneapolis, supposed liberal bastion of progressive values and egalitarianism, that has been so ignored. Ignored by the City Council; ignored by the mayor; ignored by the news; ignored by me.
Maybe borne of my upper-middle class liberal guilt over not realizing just how impoverished and abandoned this part of my city is, I have a new found interest in North Minneapolis--in its history. It can't have always been like this, right? I mean, it's an older part of the city, close to downtown, so there must have been a time when it was lovely and bustling and thriving. I am going to do some sleuthing and learn some more about the other side of my beloved city.
This increased awareness of North Minneapolis also made me wish I was still in college, so I would be motivated to do real research on the city; and maybe create a photojounalistic essay or anthropological analysis. As it is, probably I will just google "history of North Minneapolis." But, I am definitely going to go back at get a picture of the gas station.
I realized as I drove down Broadway Avenue, that in the 23 years (3 years in LA and 1 year abroad, adds up to 27 total) I have lived in Minneapolis, I have never actually driven all the way down this thoroughfare of the north side. It's like a different city/country/planet. As I drove, I was dumbfounded that the Chain of Lakes Harriet, Calhoun, and Isles were merely 5 miles away. Discount furniture places with sloppily hand-painted signs on splintering wood. Half the buildings on nearly every street abandoned and boarded up. Four young guys on a street corner, all in wheel chairs (is it overly presumptuous to assume they had all been paralyzed in gun-related incidents?). And weirdest of all, a boarded-up gas station with the sign posting Unleaded for $1.00.
I tried to take a picture of the sign, but the light turned green and I missed it. Somehow I imagine that if I go back soon, the sign will not have changed. I mean, the last time gas was $1.00 even was in about 1998. So, clearly, this gas station has been closed for around 10 years--why is it just standing there like that? How is there a part of Minneapolis, supposed liberal bastion of progressive values and egalitarianism, that has been so ignored. Ignored by the City Council; ignored by the mayor; ignored by the news; ignored by me.
Maybe borne of my upper-middle class liberal guilt over not realizing just how impoverished and abandoned this part of my city is, I have a new found interest in North Minneapolis--in its history. It can't have always been like this, right? I mean, it's an older part of the city, close to downtown, so there must have been a time when it was lovely and bustling and thriving. I am going to do some sleuthing and learn some more about the other side of my beloved city.
This increased awareness of North Minneapolis also made me wish I was still in college, so I would be motivated to do real research on the city; and maybe create a photojounalistic essay or anthropological analysis. As it is, probably I will just google "history of North Minneapolis." But, I am definitely going to go back at get a picture of the gas station.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Bummer
It is the perfect day for a Vikings game- gray, chilly, raining off and on. Yet, they don't play until tomorrow night. Bummer.
The game is against New Orleans- perhaps the outcome will be a predictor of which metropolitan area my wife will end up choosing? Of course, I'm totally impartial.
Also, Johan has a cold. Bummer.
The game is against New Orleans- perhaps the outcome will be a predictor of which metropolitan area my wife will end up choosing? Of course, I'm totally impartial.
Also, Johan has a cold. Bummer.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
On Defense
I can be defensive. It's not something I like about myself and it's something that I think about a lot. I think it's related to my deep-seeded need to have the approval of people in my life. I remember in elementary school at a goal-setting conference, my teacher asked me if the approval of my teacher, my parents, or myself was most important. I couldn't choose. I told her that I needed the approval of my teacher, my parents, and myself.
So, right, you're saying, who doesn't like praise and approval?
It's not that I think I or the things I do are perfect. I could write a list of hundreds of mistakes I've made in both my personal and professional life. (That's a blog for another day, though.) I am fairly self-reflective and think I am at least somewhat aware of my strengths and weaknesses. It's more that I worry that critique is criticism. But, I am growing and working very hard to see that critique is an opportunity to learn.
Today I was in an intense meeting with BJ and a couple of clients who had some buyer's remorse about the conclusion of their case. There had been numerous phone calls leading up to this meeting, including the clients accusing me of being racist against Latino people and of lying to them. Since racism and lying are, like, two of my least favorite things, I understandably felt offended by these accusations. As you can imagine, I didn't go in to today's meeting particularly at ease.
BJ took the lead in the meeting today, and I felt like it was a great learning experience. He had an artful way of being matter-of-fact about the work our law firm did and why the results were fair and right, yet he was not defensive. He was clearly in control of the interaction, yet he acknowledged the client concerns and conceded points that were not really important, but allowed the client to feel that he was "winning" on some of the disagreements. More than once, he noted his years of experience but that he was never too experienced to learn something new and make changes for the better.
After the meeting, BJ and I were talking and he pointed out that in many Asian cultures, apologies flow much easier than in the western world. In the law business of course, there's a fine line between apologizing for a misunderstanding and saying you screwed up. (FYI, we did not screw up.) I think the thing that was hard for me was that I didn't even really see this as a misunderstanding but rather, that these clients were trying to pull a fast one by accusing me of untrue things. The problem, of course, is that I was getting nowhere by refusing to acknowledge any error or misunderstanding from my end.
Today BJ took the lead, and by finding the perfect balance of assertiveness without defensiveness, and a willingness to acknowledge that there is always room to learn and grow, the clients signed the papers and at the end, we all shook hands.
This is a successful resolution on many levels. The case is finally resolved and the necessary papers are signed. More importantly, I think the clients feel at least somewhat satisfied with the resolution. Most importantly, I think I gained some important insight about how a person can stand their ground without being defensive, and how a person can acknowledge imperfection without admitting error.
So, right, you're saying, who doesn't like praise and approval?
It's not that I think I or the things I do are perfect. I could write a list of hundreds of mistakes I've made in both my personal and professional life. (That's a blog for another day, though.) I am fairly self-reflective and think I am at least somewhat aware of my strengths and weaknesses. It's more that I worry that critique is criticism. But, I am growing and working very hard to see that critique is an opportunity to learn.
Today I was in an intense meeting with BJ and a couple of clients who had some buyer's remorse about the conclusion of their case. There had been numerous phone calls leading up to this meeting, including the clients accusing me of being racist against Latino people and of lying to them. Since racism and lying are, like, two of my least favorite things, I understandably felt offended by these accusations. As you can imagine, I didn't go in to today's meeting particularly at ease.
BJ took the lead in the meeting today, and I felt like it was a great learning experience. He had an artful way of being matter-of-fact about the work our law firm did and why the results were fair and right, yet he was not defensive. He was clearly in control of the interaction, yet he acknowledged the client concerns and conceded points that were not really important, but allowed the client to feel that he was "winning" on some of the disagreements. More than once, he noted his years of experience but that he was never too experienced to learn something new and make changes for the better.
After the meeting, BJ and I were talking and he pointed out that in many Asian cultures, apologies flow much easier than in the western world. In the law business of course, there's a fine line between apologizing for a misunderstanding and saying you screwed up. (FYI, we did not screw up.) I think the thing that was hard for me was that I didn't even really see this as a misunderstanding but rather, that these clients were trying to pull a fast one by accusing me of untrue things. The problem, of course, is that I was getting nowhere by refusing to acknowledge any error or misunderstanding from my end.
Today BJ took the lead, and by finding the perfect balance of assertiveness without defensiveness, and a willingness to acknowledge that there is always room to learn and grow, the clients signed the papers and at the end, we all shook hands.
This is a successful resolution on many levels. The case is finally resolved and the necessary papers are signed. More importantly, I think the clients feel at least somewhat satisfied with the resolution. Most importantly, I think I gained some important insight about how a person can stand their ground without being defensive, and how a person can acknowledge imperfection without admitting error.
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