Updates Etc.

I just bought another can of "Nutri" soda. I don't think it's nutritious but it is sugar free and delicious, and a nice variation from diet coke and water (not together, just my 2 main beverages.)

In other news, last weekend I went to Madison for Sarah's birthday and general merrymaking. It was my first overnight away from Johan and it was just fine. I'd say it was downright fabulous. It was nice to re-experience the me I was before Johan was born. Well, not exactly, because of course he's on my mind quite a bit, but to be able to just enjoy adult time with my friends, uninterrupted by toddler demands. Johan went up to the lake with Grandpa and Grandma, and besides getting carsick and totally grossing everybody out in the car on the way there, it seems like he had a good time too.

Finally, my first jury trial flying solo starts Monday. More on that later. Like maybe when there's a verdict.

Supreme(ly discriminatory) Court of CA

I haven't read the decision yet, but it upholds Proposition 8 in such a weird way- no gay marriage except for the gays who are already married. Huh? In true conspiracy theorist fashion, I am wondering if the California Supreme Court purposely is violating the 14th Amendment so that the United States Supreme Court will hear the case and make a landmark decision in (hopefully) in favor of equal rights for all. I guess a SCOTUS decision would probably be pretty narrow in this situation- remand and quit being morons CA Supreme Court. This decision just seems such an obvious and plebeian violation of the 14th Amendment that there must be something else going on, right?

"Nutri" Soda?

Today at the fancy grocery store where Johan and I go to enjoy samples on the weekend, they were serving Nutri.Soda. The flavors were Immunity, Energy, Serenity, Eternal Happiness, Fountain of Youth, Millions of Flowers and Dollars,and on and on. Since they were 2 for 1 and I can't resist a good deal, I bought a few. They are sweetened with Splen.da so calorie-free and are quite delicious - carbonated citrus, black cherry, mandarin. The perfect drink for a warm Spring day (you know, besides Absolut Mandarin).

But, I'm not so sure about the Nutri part. Seems like BS to promise that if I drink carbonated water with artificial sweetener and flavoring, I will experience heightened energy, alertness, happiness. Everyone knows only coffee can do that.

I will bring her water

Today was my grandma's funeral. There's much to say and nothing all at the same time. Maybe another time.

But, the day for me was summed up in a few words my mom's best friend/my godmother said.

My mom was to give a tribute and she forgot to bring a bottle of water. My mom needs a bottle of water with her at all times, no exceptions. So, I called my godmother and asked if she could swing by the gas station on the way to the church. And she said.

"I will bring her water."

And she did. Something struck me about these words- they seem to be symbolic for how much we rely on one another, especially in difficult times.

I felt loved and surrounded today. I think that, for everything she went through in her life, my Grandma always had someone by her side who would bring her water.

The Wrong Order...

That's what my 103-year-old Great Grandma said when we told her that her daughter, my grandma, had died. My grandma died the evening of Mother's Day.

She had been sick and spent the last several months in pain and unhappy. So, in some ways,there is an element of relief--for her sake-- but it's also a sad reality for those of us left here. Especially her mother. That's the thing that keeps making me teary and choked up--that my grandma's mom is suffering this. I think it's fair to say that losing a child is the worst, most painful thing someone can experience, no matter how old you are.

I am grateful that I spent many hours with my Grandma on Mother's Day. I am grateful that I lived 2 blocks from my Grandma for most of my childhood. I am grateful that she saw me graduate from college and law school; celebrated my wedding(s); and was able to spend a year and a half getting to know Johan.

I am grateful that this was our last substantive conversation, on the morning of Mother's Day.

Grandma: Kristina, I dreamed that you and I argued last
night.

Kristina: What about?

G: Opening doors, closing doors.

K: Huh..well, who won?

G: I just quit arguing with you.

K: Oh, so I won.

G: Well, I don't know about all that.

She may not have been a lawyer, but she certainly was able to hold her own in an argument, about doors and just about anything else.

Mama's Day

I try to keep this blog from being solely a baby/kids blog, although as Johan gets older and starts saying hilarious things, that might be hard. Nevertheless, tomorrow is Mother's Day and it's cheesy Hallmark made up holiday, but the idea of celebrating women who care for and mother children is one I can get behind.

Being Johan's mom is something that makes me feel wonderful. To think that 2 years ago I had only recently found out I was going to have a kid, and that I didn't even know Johan is so strange. Since the moment he was born, he has been at the forefront of every decision I make. From casting my vote to deciding if I can go to happy hour after work, Johan is a consideration. I'm certainly not a perfect mom (yesterday Johan cheered when "Family Guy" came on the TV....ee-yee) but I do the best I can, and think that so far, I'm not doing too shabby. Most of all, I feel grateful for the opportunity to raise this child and the opportunity to experience maternal love. It can say that it is true that there is nothing like the love you feel for your child--it is an incredible experience to feel absolute unconditional unwavering selfless love. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Happy Mother's Day.

Remember this?:

May Days and Monkeys

I think I've learned my lesson. I keep trying to bring Johan lots of fun places where he will see and experience new and exciting things. And it keeps being a bust.

A few weeks ago, we went to the Minnesota Zoo. Otters, tigers, camels, monkeys, baby farm animals. Johan's favorite part was the french fries we had for lunch on the way home.

Today was the May Day Parade- a Minneapolis institution. Wonderful puppetry; anarchists on tall bicycles; anti-capitalist floats celebrating life. While Johan enjoyed the drums and other music, I think he had more fun playing with his red kickball in the yard before we left.

Where is the balance between exposing your kid to culture and new things and letting your kid just run around in the yard to his heart's content? I think it's the line between the zoo and May Day. I only brought Johan to the zoo because I thought he would like it. However, we went to the May Day parade because it's something that I really enjoy and because I think it's a wonderful community event. Hence, animal-viewing only for toddler's benefit/enjoyment: NO. Child-friendly community parade that is both visually pleasing and in line with our morals: YES.

Sure, we'll try the zoo again in a few years- once Johan is old enough to enjoy the dolphin show and appreciate viewing animals in a replica of their natural habitat. And we'll certainly be at next year's May Day parade. I do think, though, that we will try to spend most of our weekends this summer just playing. Because that's what Johan likes to do.

brick in the wall.

It's no secret I am frugal (cheap.) We are going to be shelling out a couple thou for a new retaining wall in the next few days. The old wall was cement cinder blocks and literally crumbling down. It looked trashy and unkempt. I don't like trashy. Except for magazines and gossip, but I digress.

I first groused about having to spend money on the wall- I mean, I should be contributing more to my 401k and investing more and I would certainly rather spend the money on a trip that on manual labor and stone. But, it had to be done. Really no choice.

Now the wall is up and it's gorgeous. When I pulled up to my house coming home from work today, I felt excited and proud of our home looks. I still would rather have my 1000s to spend another way, but I certainly can't complain about the new and improved, face-lifted Casa de Johan and family.