B.D., no B.E.

Today is my birthday. Usually one of my favorite days of the year surrounded by favorite people and enjoying favorite restaurants and bars.

Not this year. Besides the fact that most of my family is out of town and my husband works tonight, I'm not convinced I could actually enjoy any outings anyway. This is because the bar exam is now only 13 days away, and I am on edge. I feel like Tweak from South Park. (See little kid on the right).

If you're unfamiliar, Tweak is the little kid that's always hopped up on coffee and has inappropriately strong reactions to normal stimuli, primarily manifested by emitting short, alarmed shrieks. That is me now. The fact of the matter is, no matter how much I study, there is not enough time to learn all of what I "should" know. I am actually not that afraid of failing. I don't think I will. And I am not stressed out so much that I am unable to sleep or eat (God forbid). But I do have this sort of tweaked out edge about me. Talking a bit too fast and too loud. Jerky movements. Eyes wide and brow furrowed. A general sort of unpleasantness that I don't think will lift until I am safe at Lake Mille Lacs on July 26.

So, it's ok that this birthday is likely going to be less celebratory than most. I think I will do some practice questions, maybe write a practice essay, and then watch a little South Park. At this point, only Tweak really understands.