On my dad's side of the family, we have started a new tradition of getting together one Sunday a month to have brunch and spend some of the day together. It's a good plan.
This last Sunday was the first brunch. After the egg dishes and Norwegian heart-shaped waffles were consumed, we retired to the sun room to watch some old home movies my dad had transferred to DVDs. Fun, right? In order to make sure my niece and nephew were featured in the home movies, we skipped over the 1980s and went straight to the 1990s videos.
Holy Christ was I a bitch. Sassy and sharp-tongued and bossing my brother around like you can't believe. Except if you knew me back then, which a lot of you who read this did. At one point, when my dad was taping us on a vacation in Florida, I spent 5 minutes whining about some video tape of Jamie and me dancing to American Pie on the front lawn and where was that damn movie and why do we tape everything but never watch anything.
Watching an old video of oneself is totally different than looking at old photos. In a snapshot, everyone is usually smiling; there is really no context. A video lays everything out: Christmas of 1995 when I was 14 was a shitty time for me- lots of teenage melodrama. Photos of Christmas '95 don't really tell that story but my snarly responses to my dad and the dejected tone of my voice in the home movies really take a girl back in time.
Now I'm not sure if I want to watch the ones from the 1980s. In retrospect, I consider my childhood a happy one. I was always clothed, fed, loved. But I had a lot of anger and sadness about my parents' divorce and so I wonder if I was as bitchy a child as I was a teen (no question that as a child I was as bossy as when I was a teen, if not more so). I'm definitely going to watch all of the old home movies, but I think it may be better done with a stiff drink in my hand and a willingness to just laugh at myself and remember that, despite my miserable attitude, things did turn out ok for me.
5 comments:
Every once and a while I still bitch about that lost video of us singing American Pie. Maybe it wouldn't be able to live up to how awesome I remember us being, but sometimes the principle of never even getting to watch it after we made it still irks me. More than anything, though, I'd love to have a video our dance to "In Your Room." That number totally showcased our, ahem, talent.
P.S. Back then you were Brenda Walsh-brand bitchy--a real treat for people whose side you were always on and who made sure not to cross you.
see, the things is- that video might not actually be lost. there are many more DVDs to watch and my guess is the 1993 one is going to have that very dance. I don't think my dad was there for the "In Your Room" show so that will just have to keep replaying in our memories.
Saying I was like Brenda Walsh is the nicest thing anyone has said all day to me. I'll always be on your side.
You should see videos of me as a child. Good christ. We definitely would have been mortal enemies, as I'm pretty sure there isn't enough room for two bossy, asshole 8-year-olds in one room.
we did ok as two 22-year-old bossy assholes living in the same house.
you sure did turn out well and i second everything jamie said about you being Brenda Walsh style bitchy. i think you are marvelous, and always were.
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