Reflections on Being a Divorced Kid at Christmas

Don't worry- this isn't depressing. I've long since gotten over the self pity and anger of being a divorced kid. In fact, I think that growing up divorced has given me the ability to take the presence and/or absence of loved ones in stride.

Let me explain.

I was never with my mom on Christmas Eve and never with my dad on Christmas Day. There was always somebody missing who I wished was there. Nope- this still isn't self pity. Because who wants to sit around feeling gloomy on Christmas? So, you just get over it- enjoy the holiday with who is there and pretty quickly come to the realization that there's no such thing as a perfect holiday and you don't always get everybody you want to be with all at the same time. And that's ok.

So, would I prefer to be with Eduardo on Christmas? Sure. But it's not the end of the world. We had a Christmas celebration before he left and we talked both Christmas Eve and Day.

And do I miss my brother and wish he would have been noshing on Norwegian meatballs and lefse with us on Christmas Eve? Hell yes. But, life isn't always just the way you want it.

Apparently there is/was a rumor going around Linden Hills among some friends of my brother that my whole family was sitting around on Christmas Eve sad and weeping, unable to enjoy Christmas because we missed David. Those rumor-spreaders obviously don't realize what it's like to be part of a blended family- every person at our holiday celebration knows that there's always going to be somebody missing.

Of course we love David and miss David and look forward to the Christmases we can be together again. But, his absence doesn't mean we won't eat delicious food; tell stories about my late Grandpa and his goofy stocking-stuffers; watch Johan try to figure out his new gravel yard boulder smasher toy; laugh at the dog in his new blanket with sleeves; laugh some more; and otherwise enjoy our time together.

In fact, that's just what we did. So lay those rumors to rest, Linden Hills gossipy youth. Divorced kids got the skillz.

Christmas Shopping in the Eastern Bloc

I am home from my Christmas Shopping Bonanza. Johan is at my mom's for the night since she is taking care of him tomorrow and they want to sleep in. Christmas shopping was much less nightmarish than it would have been had I also been responsible for Johan's enjoyment. Maybe it's because there are only 4 days until Christmas, but I had numerous WTF moments:

- There was no Scotch tape at Target. None. I have no idea how I am going to wrap these gifts. There might be some blue painters tape in the basement.

- I stood at the jewelry counter at Macys for a good 20 minutes and no one even tried to sell me anything. I could not find a single person willing to open the case. Finally, I tracked someone down and insisted on an extra 10% discount for my 20 minutes. It should have been an extra 20%. I may write a strongly worded letter to Macys and hope for some more discounts in the New Year.

- The guy at the JC Penney men's clothing counter did not know how to scan a credit card. He sheepishly asked me if I had cash and I said No. He had to call the manager over. I had a $10 coupon so I didn't bitch too much. I mean, poor kid, he works at JC Penney.

- My cousin's daughter likes Barbies so I thought I would get Doctor Barbie or Astronaut Barbie or Trial Attorney Barbie. The only ones at Target were in bikinis. Rows and rows of bikini Barbies. I finally found one in jeans and a shirt that says "Hussy" or "Bee-yotch" or something. How retro of Barbie to no longer have a career. Unless you count hussy as a career. I don't.

And finally...

- The only to/from labels left at Target were one sheet of Disney princess labels. Another woman was also looking for labels and these were the only package left. She didn't want them. They were stupidly expensive and the package is sort of bent and tattered. And I don't know anybody who likes Disney princesses. But I bought them anyway. Everyone damn well better love Disney princesses this year.


The shopping is done, though. I am most excited about wrapping the tiny little trinkets that will go in Johan's stocking: 2-inch Big Bird figurine; an Elmo bouncy ball; tiny-sized Doctor Seuss board books; a yellow shirt; a yellow matchbox car; a yellow tin of M&Ms; striped socks; and some other stuff I can't remember.

Now if only I had some Scotch tape.

Alcantfalas

Today I received a Christmas card from a 2nd cousin once removed or something.

It was addressed to "The Alcantfala family."

I don't think it was a Deck the Halls and fa la la la la la la la la joke.

I think he just doesn't know our last name.

But that's cool.

Good to know...

I have become totally addicted to this website. You can search for celebrity political contributions and there is even a ticker that gives you the total dollar amount for certain celebrities and then you can expand to see if they are Red or Blue.

Some are no-brainers. Yep, Tom Hanks and Bruce Springsteen are staunch Democrats. (But seriously, only $12,000, Boss? Come on. What you been singing about?)

A couple of interesting surprises:

Alec Baldwin has donated over $130k to Blue candidates. I guess I will be watching 30 Rock more often .

Don Henley (yep, the very same who sings "Boys of Summer" and "End of the Innocence" has donated over $650k to Blue candidates and causes. Holy shit. Maybe I should buy one of his CDs instead of just periodically checking the radio station featuring the best of the 80s, 90s, and today.

Also, you should know that Amy Grant is only donating to Republicans and the RNC. Disappointing since I was just about to buy her latest CD. As if.

On Making New Friends

Sometimes I think I don't need new friends. I have some pretty fantastic ones. The one thing about them is that they are all far away. Flagstaff, Jo-burg, Los Angeles, Chicago. I have many minutes on my cell phone plan.

Since moving back to Minneapolis in 2003, I have made a couple friends. We went to law school together and they are great, but I don't see them often and one has a kid just a bit older than Johan so usually our time together is about the kids.

Recently, I have realized I do need some new local girlfriends. There is little I enjoy more than hours of conversation where one topic just seamlessly flows into the next without hesitation or awkwardness. And wine. Wine goes well with conversation.

I have recently spent this kind of time with 2 people- another attorney at my firm and a friendly acquaintance from high school who I reconnected with a few weeks ago at a reunion.

There is something very exciting to me about this- it's almost like when kids first connect with people at a new school. So much to talk about; so much to learn about the new friends; exchanging phone numbers; first play dates. Except we are in our late 20s. And drink a lot of wine.

Johan's a STAR.

Johan was featured on a friend's blog recently.

He is one of my favorite things, too.

Shares

It's official and I can now share this very exciting news. Beginning in 2010, I will be a shareholder of Robichaud & Anderson.

I am thrilled. It is faster than I thought it would happen, but I have already felt as though the firm was "mine" for quite some time and it feels great to have that made official.

Last night at that law firm annual party, Robichaud of R&A announced to our staff that I would become a partner in January, which is why it's now ok to announce in the blogworld.

I have been thinking today about how fortunate I am to love going to work every day. It's a rare thing, I think, to love both the work and the people. Sure, there are rough days and frustrations, but this law firm and I are a match made in...downtown Minneapolis. It feels right and I think the best is yet to come.

I mean, when an annual party ends at bar close with a red hot dance performance by middle aged lawyers, how could anyone ever want to leave that?

So, as of 4 weeks from now, it will be Robichaud, Anderson, & Kristina the Shareholder.

Marketing Ideas

The life of a lawyer at a small law firm involves constantly thinking up new ways to get clients. Recently, one of our more useful contacts terminated and we are on a mission to start 2010 with a strong marketing effort. We've got the traditional bases covered: newspapers; radio; TV (yes, launching a TV commercial in 2010!), and wining and dining classmates, colleagues and others who can be good referral sources.

But, I know that I have some people out there who read this and MUST have some good ideas for creative marketing strategies. Come out, come out wherever you are. Come out of the woodwork - and please, share what's worked for you in your quests for clients. I'm not necessarily even just looking for strategies applicable to law- a lot of marketing I think applies across different industries, so let's hear (read) those ideas.

Go!