Judging J. Lo.

The other day I was skimming the People magazine article and photo spread of J. Lo and the new babies. They aren't actually that cute. So far, they look much more like dad than mom. Bummer for them. Anyway, in response to a question about why she is not nursing, she says something like, "Everyone reads up and decides what's best for their baby."

Bullshit. There is no article ANYWHERE that says formula is better than breast milk. ANYWHERE. I think the federal government even requires formula companies to preface all their ads and materials with "breast milk is best." So, unless J. Lo. paid some folks to write some materials just for her about why formula is better, I call bullshit.

Of course to nurse or not to nurse is an intensely personal decision and the "better person" in me would live and let live. But, as someone who is away from my child for 50+ hours a week and still successfully nurses without pumping while I am away, I feel like I am in a place to judge J. Lo's lies.

She isn't choosing to not nurse them because it's better for them. She's chosen to bottle feed so her tits remain as perky as her ass. She's insured and has to make her moneymaker last. I can appreciate that, but at least tell the truth about it.

Kids who aren't breastfed tend to get sicker than those who are. They are far more likely to have food and environmental allergies. And they tend to be fatter kids. Wouldn't it be poetic justice if the J. Lo twins ended up continuing looking like their dad (FUG-ly), and were little fat sausages with perpetually runny noses and severe allergies to peanuts and shellfish. The nerdiest of all combinations possible. It would serve J. Lo right for putting perked boobs ahead of her children's well-being.

Now I will go back to my day, and I'd like to say the judging is over. But we all know it probably isn't.